52 Ancestors Week 29: Cousins

 From Amy Johnson Crow: Week 29: Cousins

The theme for Week 29 is “Cousins.” As genealogists, we know that there are more kinds of cousins than just the children of our aunts and uncles. This week, write about a cousin – no matter how “distantly” they are related to you!

What a motley crew.

    Cousins are awesome. There's no doubt about that because they're your first friends! If you're the youngest of the cousins in your family,  you're usually told stories about just how crazy your family truly is and if you're the oldest you get to tell the kids about how grandma's dolls come to life every night and rearrange the furniture. Not saying I've ever done that. However, I needed to make up some kind of story behind grandma Natalie's creepy dolls. They had nothing on "Annabelle".

    As you might have guessed, I'm one of the older cousins in my family. My brother Jim is the oldest of Robert and Natalie's grandkids and we have eight first cousins. That's only the tip of the iceberg! My family is huge. REALLY huge and getting everyone together in one place is like herding cats. I grew up with cousins on both sides of the tree and knew many of my second cousins. To list them all would take some time. I've even known about some cousins long before I ever took a DNA test. Stories were told about these cousins through the family grapevine and one such cousin is genealogist Mary Tedesco.

Maria Tedesco and family

    Mary shares almost the same name as my great-grandmother Maria Tedesco and when other genealogists look at my family tree I'm always asked if I'm related to Mary. If I had a nickel.... 

I know full well that "Tedesco" is a common Italian name like "Coppola". Here's the thing. A common name in one country, doesn't necessarily mean it's common in one small Italian town.

    I can say with absolute certainty that Mary Tedesco is a cousin of mine. There is no doubt about it. Our families were paisanos from the Calabrian town of San Pietro a Maida.  It goes a little bit more than just being countrymen, of course. I should probably explain from the beginning.

    I first heard about Mary when my father was talking about how my grandfather Marco was close with a man named Edward Tedesco. Edward hailed from the same Calabrian town as my grandfather and lived in Woburn, Mass with his very large family. Edward also had several brothers and sisters who also lived in the area. To make things even more interesting, Edward was named my father's godfather when he was born in 1947. Sufficed it to say, the families were close. Ah, but this is only the tip of the iceberg.

    My parents told me the story about how Edward and several members of the Woburn Tedesco family were invited to my parents' wedding in 1971. Marco made it a point to invite all of the Italians to the gathering. These were mostly Marco and grandma Ollie's relatives. Several people came to the party and my parents even got a wedding gift from one of the Tedescos. My dad mentioned Edward's granddaughter Mary who was about my age and I thought nothing of it for years. It was one of those things you just kept in the back of your mind and let simmer.

    Years went by and I registered on Ancestry.com. I created a family tree there in 2006 and let that simmer. I wasn't getting many hints for the Italian side of the tree aside from the information another genealogist name Mary found for the Carrabis families in Gesualdo. I was going nowhere fast with my dad's paternal side at that point and I let the tree sit there and cook on Ancestry.  What else could I do? I did talk to my great-aunt Nickie and she confirmed a lot of what my father told me about the Tedescos. She just didn't know the exact connection we had and I thought that was odd.

  Some more time passed and I got an e-mail in 2011 saying I had a private message on Ancestry. It was from a user named "Mmtedesco". I logged onto Ancestry and this lady named Mary sent me a message.

    Mary said that she saw my grandfather Marco in my tree along with his mother, Maria. Her grandfather Edward told her that we were all related. Edward must have told her the same stories my father and Nickie told me. And like me she had no idea what our connection was. Edward had fond memories  of growing up with Marco and that Marco was a godfather to one of her uncles. She asked if I'd be willing to swap info with her and of course I jumped at the chance! Who wouldn't?

    I wrote back to her and she said Edward had many great memories about Marco, my father and everyone else in the family. We talked for a bit and things went silent for a few years. I had no idea what happened. Life must have gotten in the way. That and Ancestry's messaging system was not as instantaneous as I would have liked back then. 

    Nevertheless, we still tried to stay in contact. Though, I probably should have added her to my Facebook back then. It would have made life so much easier. We still messaged each other on the site and I updated her on a few things. I found that her grandfather passed away in 2016 and offered my condolences. It's a shame we never got to meet face to face because the dude drew comics. I would have LOVED to have met him! 

Yup. Still 50% pesto.

    By 2017, we still hadn't found the connection. Mary invited me to her Facebook group and I saw that she was a pretty big deal in the genealogy community. She cohosted "Genealogy Roadshow" on PBS and had an amazing blog.

    While doing a search for my great-grandfather Vincenzo, I found a blog she wrote about the first Italian-American Thanksgiving and in it she mentioned Vincenzo, Maria and their family. I remember her writing about how her family went to Vincenzo's house in Haverhill to have Thanksgiving there. According to Nicolina, that was one of many family get-togethers. Check the blog out here!

    I asked Mary about the blog and she said that it was one of the many memories her grandfather had. She then asked if my father and I would ever do a DNA test on Ancestry. I asked my dad (who was talking to Nicolina at the time about the same topic!) and we decided to take the test. What did we have to lose?

    My father and I took our tests and sure enough we matched Mary and countless other members of her family. There are just too many to list. I checked my dad's match list and he had more matches at greater cM ranges. Then an idea popped in my head. What if I had access to Nicolina's test? Nicolina and her daughter Cathie were more than happy to let me see her test results and sure enough Mary and her family were on the list with one of Edward's sisters leading the pack at a hefty 133 cMs. DNA does not lie. There is a connection!

    I asked Mary about that match and she wasn't sure what to tell me. She still wasn't sure what our connection was. So, I decided  right there to make it my mission to find that connection and I believe I finally found it after so many years. It only took digging through the entire San Pietro a Maida archive and using new features at Ancestry and DNApainter to do it. It was a process that took a long time and many years. I think we can all agree I had vested interest in finding the connection.

     Using the tools at my disposal, I put everyone into a probability tree on DNApainter. I used my great-aunt as a basis for everything since she had the highest number of matches and the strongest matches in general. I put the tree together and it told me that one hypothesis was probably the most likely reason why there was a connection.

    To confirm this I had to do some good old fashioned genealogy and probably annoyed some of the family in Italy in the process. If I did that, I am so sorry! Either way, I knew from my research that Edward had a father named Giuseppe. He was the one who initially moved to Woburn and everything in the 1920s.

    My first inclination was to ask the family in Italy if my second great-grandfather Antonio had a brother named Giuseppe. He did not.  I asked the commune office in San Pietro a Maida about Giuseppe's parents and found that they were Fortunato Tedesco and Caterina Butruce. Fortunato's parents turned out to be Giuseppe Tedesco and Caterina Rocca. At this point I was in the 1840s and still hadn't found the connections. I tried not to let my frustration get the better of me. I was so close I could feel it! I ended up digging through the archives and found three Giuseppe Tedescos who could have been Fortunato's father. One kid was born in the 1830s and the other was born in 1843. As weird as it sounds those were the only two people named Giuseppe Tedesco that I found in the entire archive who were possibly the father. There was one Giuseppe Tedesco born in 1844 and the names of his parents didn't synch with what I had in my tree. See what I mean about common names being not that common in some places?

Archivo Stato Civile di San Pietro a
a Maida, Catanzaro. 
1843 births. #35.

    To make a long story short, the Giuseppe Tedesco I found born on May 6th, 1843 was the child of Tommaso Tedesco and Cecilia Cassese, my 4th great-grandparents. This meant that Mary was likely my 4th cousin once removed or a 5th cousin. This also meant that Edward and his sisters were third cousins to Marco and Nicolina as evidenced by her DNA matches with them.

    The other Giuseppe Tedesco  born in 1834 had different parents. They were Giuseppe Tedesco and Catarina Gullo. While I do have a connection to the Gullo family, it seemed more logical to me that the 1843 Giuseppe was Maria's ancestor based on Nicolina's matches with her great-aunt and the sheer volume of matches. Like I said before. She matched virtually every single member of Mary's family and all of them are a solid match.

    Now, I could be mistaken. I could have some error or something else I couldn't have foreseen. This is a lucky guess and it's a solid one. Whatever the case is, it's clear that Mary and I are cousins. The paper trail and DNA evidence proved it without a shadow of a doubt.

    Once I solved the puzzle, I showed it to several other genealogists and they came to the same conclusion I made and agreed with my assessment. I showed Mary herself and I'm hoping she liked my discovery. I have yet to hear from her on that front. The really cool thing is that the discovery about the connection coincided with a discovery in my parents' wedding album. In the guestbook were the signatures of one of Mary's ancestors and several of her great-aunts who eventually had their DNA tested on Ancestry as well.

    Many people say I have a lot of determination to get things done and I do. I'm not going to lie. I had real vested interest in finding my connection to Mary because of the stories my father and others told me, the various gifts the family received and all that. DNA matches was one thing, this was something else. This was an attempt to solve a very old riddle and I'm glad I solved it with some help from some amazing friends and family. I found many cousin connections over the years and this one was the most important one I had to solve and I'm glad I finally solved it. At least I hope I did!

See ya next time!

52 Ancestors Week 28: Travel

 From me: Oh, the places you'll go. That's not just a Dr. Suess book. Where have your ancestors traveled over the course of their lives? Did they go to another state? Another country? Write about their exploits below! Just remember whatever happened in Vegas STAYS in Vegas!

WE'RE ON A BOAT!

    Traveling is a fun way to see the world and experience new things. We live on a small blue planet that's rich in many different cultures and ways of life. If you have the means you should get out there every once in a while and experience all that this world has to offer. One of my friends has visited almost every single continent and at the time of this writing he plans on visiting Africa. I wonder if he'll find Pride Rock from the "Lion King" there. There really is so much to see out there in just one lifetime.

    As for me, it's safe to say that my ancestors have traveled around the world whenever they had the chance. Some people traveled for work. Some people traveled for vacation. Sometimes ancestors of mine have made it a point to turn a travel destination into a vacation home. I think it's time to talk about how a trip to the most magical place on Earth was also a trip to both of my grandmother's houses.

    My grandmother Olympia may have made Haverhill, Mass her home. However, she and her husband Marco had a winter home in Stuart, Florida.  Yes, I know that this technically makes my grandparents "snowbirds" and everything. It is what it is. Older people generally don't like being cold and even my grandpa Bob had a home in Florida. There's nothing wrong with visiting the Sunshine state from time to time. Just watch out for the snakes, freak rainstorms and crazy people. Caution: Crazy people isn't just a Florida thing!

    I honestly don't remember Ollie's house in Florida that well. I have vague memories of her sharing the place with her sisters Louise and Ellie after Marco had passed away. It was around that time that we decided to visit Ollie and her sisters and visit the Magic Kingdom, Sea World and all the attractions that were there at the time.

    From what my parents remember, getting there was not easy. We unfortunately had a delay and we were stuck at Boston's Logan International Airport. Now, picture my parents with two young children sitting in the terminal getting antsy because we were going nowhere fast. I don't really remember what caused the delay. I have a feeling it might have had something to do with the weather in Boston since it was winter time and winter usually meant a lot of snow in New England. Because we didn't have screens to entertain ourselves, my parents made sure we had plenty of books to read and for the most part we were quiet. At least I hope we were. I just remember getting my fill of the "Garfield" books I had in my backpack. That orange cat never failed to disappoint.

Yes, I'm wearing a DC shirt despite being
a Marvel fanboy. =D

    Eventually, we made it to Florida and as luck would have it my other grandparents were enjoying their stay in the Sunshine state as well! Grandpa Robert and my grandmother Natalie were at their home in Holiday. This meant that we'd have to find the time to go from the east coast of the state to the west coast and still get to the Magic Kingdom all in the space of a couple weeks. Could it be done? Well, when you wish upon a star.....

    Our first stop in our tour of Florida was of course Ollie's house. The other little old Italian ladies were there as well and I remember watching them all eating lunch at the kitchen island. For some reason they were all standing up. I have no idea why and this was decades before people were told it's better to stand at a desk rather than sit at one. It was one of those things they did that made them so endearing. After a quick visit, it was off to Orlando in our fashionable rental car that smelled weird. Like Florida weird.

    We went to Disney and had a great time. I distinctly remember going on Figment's imagination ride in EPCOT and well...that might explain a few things. No, I didn't drink the water! But, I did make it a point to get as plushie version of that dragon. He was awesome! And still is! Dragons are cool.

    Dragons aside we also went to Sea World while we were there we got to see the then current iteration of  legendary orca named "Shamu". I guess it's true what they say. Shamu can never die. Only the whales who portray her. Seeing the orcas and dolphins were cool and all. But, I think I'd rather see them out in the wild rather than in captivity. Still was a treat. After our visit it was then time to go to the left coast of Florida and to my other grandparents' house.

So, you gonna free us orrr.....?

`   I don't really remember much about the visit to my grandparents' house in Holiday. I do remember talking to them about the trip and asking them if they were going to come back north since my brother and I missed them. I seem to recall seeing my grandmother's collection of creepy dolls for the first time while we were there. It was the first encounter with her life-like dolls and it definitely wasn't going to be the last! Wherever they went, those dolls followed them. There was no escape! They were just so life-like and creepy looking. To a six year old they were pure nightmare fuel! It's a good thing we never inherited them! 

       After a tearful goodbye we made our way back to Salem and thankfully things went a lot smoother. No flights were delayed. There was even an in-flight movie. Of course I don't remember what it was. It was the mid 1980s. It could have been "Airplane!" for all I know. Actually, that wouldn't have been bad. Who doesn't like Leslie Nielsen?

Spaceship Earth! We have a pic of it from
when it was under construction!

    This was just one of the trips my family and I have taken together. We love to travel and I hope one day I get to extend my traveling experience to places outside this hemisphere. Where would I go? Well, I think we all know the answer to that one. The possibilities are endless. I love to travel and this world has so many places to see and many people to meet.

    I am glad I have those memories of traveling to Florida. I'll admit I was young and I don't remember a whole lot about what happened. But, those memories I do have stayed with me because that was the first trip I actually remember. And pics like the ones I've shared today help bring those memories back to the surface.

   Traveling can make you appreciate more of what this world has to offer and I'm glad I got a chance to go. Regrettably, I haven't been to Disney since the 1980s. But, that's okay. We had other exploits that make Disney look like a walk on the beach. Perhaps one day I'll talk about the trips to the Bahamas and Aruba. At least the visit to the Magic Kingdom was unique. I haven't been back since even though my brother took his family there a few years ago. Perhaps one day I'll return and check out the Marvel and Star Wars attractions. Wow, Disney REALLY has changed since I last visited forty years ago. The most magical place on Everyone! 

See ya next time!    

52 Ancestors Week 27: Family Business

 From Amy Johnson Crow: Week 27:

The theme for Week 27 is “Family Business.” Do you have an ancestor who ran his or her own business? What about a trade that seems to run in the family? This is a good week to write about them!

"On this the day of my daughter's wedding...."

   As strange as it sounds, I don't really have any family businesses in my family tree unless you count the laborers in Italy. I do have people who owned a business or two, though. My great-grandfather Alfred Hamel had a fix-it shop in Newburyport and none of his children ever took over the business. When Alfred passed away in 1962 that was the end of the Fix-It shop. For true family businesses, we're going to have to cast a wider net to the rest of my family tree because there's one collateral relative or two who definitely meet the criteria for family business. 

    Two of Giovanni Coppola's children had businesses of their own and only one of them has lasted to this very day.  For those of you keeping score, Giovanni was the first cousin of my second great-grandmother Caterina Coppola. He was responsible for inviting several people to Haverhill, Mass including my great-grandfather Vincenzo, his wife and their children.

    To make a long story short, he had two children who went on to have very, very different family businesses. His son Frank owned and operated the Coppola bus company in Haverhill until his death in 1979. His children continued the business and they ran it until 2019 when it was sold to North Reading Transport.

    Meanwhile, Giovanni's daughter Concetta married a man named Guido Pitocchelli who started his own funeral home business with his brother in nearby Lawrence, Massachusetts and as amazing as it seems that funeral home still operates today albeit under a slightly different name. These days it's known as the Pitocchelli Bros & Joseph A Langone Jr Funeral Home. Times change, I guess. But, back in the day my family had a close and unfortunate connection with the funeral home.

    When my great-grandmother Maria Tedesco passed away in the March of 1943, the Pitocchelli funeral home hosted the funeral and almost every single Italian in Haverhill at the time was there. At least that's what it feels like when I look at the list of who all went to the service.

    When I first found the list in my great-grandfather's toolbox, I wondered why the funeral was in Lawrence and not in Haverhill. You would think they'd have gone to one of the many places in Haverhill to have a service. After all, Maria was buried in Saint Patrick's cemetery in Haverhill.  So, why did they go to Lawrence for the service?

    The only thing I can think of is that maybe it had to do with the familial connection? Vincenzo was a cousin of Concetta and Concetta was married to the funeral director. Because of that link, Vincenzo and Guido were likely friends. So, he might have offered to have the service in Lawrence rather than in Haverhill. I'm sure there's another reason for it. But, that's the only thing I can think of at the moment.

Giovanni Coppola in his grocery store.

        Even though Concetta and Guido's son, Sabatino didn't go into the family business, the Pitocchelli funeral home does count as a family business. It was owned and operated by the family and they provided a tremendous service to Lawrence and of course nearby Haverhill much like Giovanni's grocery store.

    I'm not sure when the name changed. I would think it happened shortly after Guido passed away in 1995. Concetta passed away in 2007. She likely had to deal with the sale, name changes and all the headaches that come with a business changing hands.  It is nice that the name is still there after all these years as it gives the funeral home a lasting legacy. Though, I will admit I had to check the spelling of Pitocchelli more than a few times as I was writing the blog.

    It's good to know that there are some family businesses somewhere in the tree as there's a legacy surrounding them. When you look at a restaurant that's been open since the 1920s, you want to learn more about its story. Who started it? Why? Who owns it now? It's nice to see some legacy companies around and it makes me want to learn more about it. Sadly, I haven't been able to find much on the funeral home. Their website doesn't go into their history that much and it's a shame because I bet it's got a long and storied history. To each their own, I guess. At least the funeral home was there for my grandfather's family at a very sad moment of their lives and that it was run by family as well. I think that maybe helped with their loss since family was around to support them in their time of need.

See ya next time!

Picture of the Coppola family is from O'Malley, Patricia Trainor. "Italians in Haverhill". pg 98