52 Ancestors Week 52: Memorable

 From Amy Johnson Crow: Week 52:

The theme for Week 52 is “Memorable.” Who is memorable in your family? Who do you want to make sure isn’t forgotten? 

That nose is certainly memorable....considering I have it.

    In my family tree there are so many people who are memorable in their own way. My grandmother Ollie often gave people the shirt off her back and a warm meal. My grandfather Bob liked to tell stories about growing up in Newburyport and teach people how to improve their golf game. My grandmother Natalie loved to emborder various things and knit sweaters that honestly could compete with the Weasley sweaters from Harry Potter. The list goes on and on. However, there's one guy who was always memorable to everyone who knew him. That was definitely my grandfather Marco.

SUCH an adorable baby. ;) 

    Marco passed away in 1983 when I was just four years old. I sadly don't really have memories of him like my brother does. Jim remembers the two of them drinking water out of wine bottles. I can only picture my mother's reaction when she saw the two of them together on the couch with what looked like a bottle of vino. It was only water.....in a wine bottle!

    As you can probably guess by now he was quite the character and even though he passed away I was told so many stories about him that it didn't make his absence feel so bad. He wasn't totally missed because he definitely left a mark on his friends and family and that's the kind of legacy you want to have.

    I guess maybe dying relatively young impacted people in such a way that people don't want to forget a guy who made people laugh and made it a point to keep the family together. That was his whole deal. He was the one who started the famous Christmas Eve parties.

    He was born in San Pietro a Maida in 1925 to Vincenzo Ferraiolo and Maria Tedesco and came to America in 1929 with his mother and his sister.  When he left Italy, he left tons of cousins in Europe behind and his father really wanted to keep in touch with the family there no matter what. That determination was seemingly passed down to Marco and as a result a lot of people ended up having great memories of him either helping them out at home or just talking to them. Letters were sent back and forth and sometimes Marco and Nicolina would visit them.

    In fact, the house I grew up in is a true testament to his memory. He and my father built the house and even though there are some odd construction choices it's still a place I'm proud to call home. Still, I do have questions. Questions that not even my parents can answer. Why would someone willingly construct a way into the attic where you'd have to be Spider-Man to get up there?  Why would you make stairs to the basement a hair shorter than normal feet? The mind boggles. At least it's a conversation starter.

    Luckily, we got the basement stairs replaced. A new way into the attic is to be determined.  I hope it's soon. I may like Spidey, but, I was never bitten by a radioactive spider.

    Odd construction choices aside Marco was a good man according to my other grandfather and virtually everyone who knew him. He was the kind of guy that actually complimented my grandmother's giving nature. While she made sure you were fed, he was the one who invited you over! Talk about a couple meant for each other! 

    Whenever I asked my grandmother or my father to tell me a story about Marco they never really dodged the subject with a deflection or two. They were always more than willing to share what they knew.  

    They all knew him to be the kind of guy who made friends with people easily and would stay in contact with relatives no matter how distant they were genealogically or geographically. By the time I started really getting into genealogy, I found stories about him in the most random places.

    These weren't news stories mind you. These were actual random stories someone would share with me. For example, cousins in Italy would say "Yes, I remember Marco well when he visited San Pietro in 19XX" and just go on from there. They might have been referring to the trip he and others in my family took to Italy when they went to a wedding.

    Of course that wasn't the only time someone randomly had a story about Marco. In the first message I ever got from genealogist Mary Tedesco, she said that her grandfather remembered my grandfather quite well and told interesting stories about him to her. These are stories that stay internal. I was blown away at the time because I didn't know who Mary was and here she was telling me stories about my grandfather, a man I only ever heard about in stories and saw in photographs! She introduced herself as a cousin and that her grandfather knew mine very well. And that was true. He was my father's godfather and they were paisans.

Jim. LOOK AT THE CAMERA!!!!!!!!!

    That was random, right? Well, it's about to get even more random. When grandma Ollie passed away in 2002, she had a very large funeral in Haverhill. Everyone came from all over to say their goodbyes. It was wonderful.  I remember sitting down and this guy in a dark pin striped suit, scarf and a fedora came up to me. His skin was very dark and he looked like a very old man.

    He was accompanied by two other men who also had olive colored skin. He started talking to me and he had this very thick Italian accent. He sounded like he just got off the boat. Here's what he said to me. I'll never forget it.

"I knew-a your grandfather....a Marco. He was....He was a good man. He and Ollie were nice people. Take care of your father, okay?"

    I was like "Umm...Sure." He replied saying, "That's a good kid" And he took off. I watched him leave and I was left wondering who that guy was. I need to go back and look at Ollie's funeral guest list and find the most Italian name there. Chances are that was him! To this day I have no idea who he was. My parents had no idea. It was just so random.

    The man was obviously one of Marco's friends. How he knew him remains a mystery. Was he from San Pietro a Maida like Mary's grandfather? Was he a friend who grew up in Haverhill and never shook the accent? All I need is a name and chances are I can find something in Haverhill about that guy.  I'm sure I can find something about him.

    Grandpa Marco seemed to know everyone and everyone seemed to know him. He invited all of the Italian cousins to my parents' wedding. He visited with countless cousins who knew him quite well. I guess you could say he was a social butterfly. He was likeable and that leaves a lasting impression on everyone you meet. Growing up without him around didn't seem so bad because there were always people around who kept those memories alive and as long as people told those stories it didn't feel like he was gone.

See ya in 2026!