52 Ancestors Week 48: Very Funny

From me Week 48: Everyone has a funny story in their family history. Share one that’d be great for opening night at the Apollo theater. Or at least for Comedy Central. What funny stories do you have?

Live from New Hampshire…..

My mother uses the phrase “There’s never a dull moment in this house” whenever something funny or unexpected happens. The truth is we always had a good laugh whenever there was a family gathering of some sort. Someone would always make a comment or something so silly would happen that everyone talks about it for years after the event. I suppose that’s to be expected. When you have a large number of people together, the jokes run wild and believe it or not alcohol usually isn’t involved!

A few years ago I wrote a blog about my grandfather Robert’s epic  birthday party. While that was fun and exciting, I don’t think it holds a candle to the party we held for him just a few days earlier.

Yes, we threw him two parties! This was the one he actually knew about.  My mother and her siblings wanted to have a get together with just family at our house and then have the main event the following Saturday. The trick was keeping it a secret until that day.

The party at our house was held on June 6th, 2013, the day after  my grandfather’s actual birthday. He had just turned ninety and was as sharp ever. When we picked him up at the airport, I asked him how he was doing and he said his usual “ Eh. Not bad for an old man.” Remind me to use that line. It’s pure gold. He always said stuff like that.  Anyway, he stayed at my house for both parties. So, we had to keep the details a state secret and trust me when I say keeping a secret from him was a full time job.

Anyway, the party was a normal family event. Family came from all over and I spent most of my time with my cousins Jen, Kristyn and Ryan.  My uncle Bob flew in from Canada along with his son, Robbie.  Robbie’s sister Katelyn came from Arizona and My uncle Brian flew in from Idaho. The only people missing were my brother and his family and my cousin Brianna.

My brother still sort of took part in the festivities. We had my brother call the house on FaceTime and my grandfather got to see my brother’s kids that way. It’s so cool that he got to see many of his great-grandchildren during the trip!

For dinner we had lobster and that was the first hint of what was to come. Lobsters are a staple cuisine for us hearty New Englanders. We’ll eat them in sauce, in rolls and just plain boiled. We elected to have them boiled because that’s what my grandfather wanted. Grandpa Bob was no stranger to Red Lobster, the famous restaurant chain. Since he lived in Florida at the time it was hard for him to get decent lobsters down there. Lobsters found in New England waters are always going to be fresh.

Watch the old pro.

Freshness doesn’t always mean everything. Lobsters are messy and depending on the age their shells can be either hard or soft. Luckily the lobsters we had that night were on the soft side. I was cracking mine open like a pro. Yeah, right. My lobster had quite a bit of juice and I accidentally got my cousin Kristyn more than once. Whoops.  It wasn’t my fault! All of the grandkids were relegated to the kitchen table while my grandfather and everyone else was in the dining room eating their lobsters.

I apologized to Kristyn and before she could answer we heard a loud “pop” from the dining room followed by a lot of laughter.  We went to the dining room and everyone was laughing and pointing at something on the ceiling. I looked up and saw a lobster juice stain.

The spot will never leave.

Apparently, my uncle Brian was trying to carefully take apart the claw when suddenly juice squirted upwards and got onto the ceiling. That’s not all. My mom, a couple of my aunts and a couple other people got sprayed by the juice.

No one was mad or anything. It was just so random and no one could blame Brian since it had been a long time since he had lobster. The real funny thing is that the stain is still there and nothing we could do clean up te stain. Not even the power of OXY-Clean. 

To this day everyone still talks about the spot on the ceiling…..mainly because it’s still there. Talk about a conversation starter. We’ve had many parties in my house over the years and I don’t think we’ve ever had any reminders lasting as long as the lobster stain from the June of 2013. 

We seriously tried our best to clean it up. But, nothing worked. Even painting it didn’t help. I wonder if even Billy Mayes could have gotten it out. Who knows? At least we have memories that will last a lifetime . That and pictures! 

The party was a success and for the days leading up to the surprise party I was sending messages on Facebook to my cousins as they wanted to know what Papa was up to. He…uhh….was watching golf with the television muted for some reason. Hey. When you turn 90 you can watch television however you want!

Funny moments serve to remind us of the good times we all share together. Sometimes it’s a blink or you’ll miss it moment when lobster juice gets on the ceiling! Sometimes it’s other moments. Regardless of what it is, it’s important to laugh and have a good time with family and friends. You never know what will happen in the years after that moment. So cherish the funny moments and write them down! They will never come again! See ya next time!